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Goldilocks And The Infinite Bears


Goldilocks And The Infinite Bears Goldilocks And The Infinite Bears Goldilocks And The Infinite Bears Goldilocks And The Infinite Bears Goldilocks And The Infinite Bears Goldilocks And The Infinite Bears Goldilocks And The Infinite Bears Goldilocks And The Infinite Bears Goldilocks And The Infinite Bears Goldilocks And The Infinite Bears

Goldilocks And The Infinite Bears back

John McNamee

Price: 
£13.99

Page 45 Review by Stephen

Hysterical one-page comics with a lot of lateral thinking and a very high hit-rate which is so rarely seen outside Tom Gauld (BAKING WITH KAFKA etc), Sarah Andersen (HERDING CATS et al) and Evan Dorkin (DORK and more).

See the familiar rethought and re-wrought, your favourite legends desecrated - or at least looked at askew - like God, Godzilla, Goldilocks And The Three Bears, St. George And The Dragon, Jurassic Park, Snow White, Androcles And The Lion, Hamlet, Harry Potter, The Hungry Caterpillar, Pandora's Box, Cinderella, Raiders Of The Lost Ark and Excalibur. Rudolf's revenge is very funny

You'll even meet the Ancient Greek God of Atheism.

I know, right?

Here's Merlin who begins in already rocky territory, then goes completely off the rails:

"He who pulls the sword from the stone shall be King.
"Fish the dagger from the bowl of marbles, and you're Prime Minister.
"The cabinet shall be decided by this piñata full of ninja-stars."

Dirty dairy farmer scratches his head:

"I just don't get politics."

Each successive swipe at the Bible's a belter, be it the 7-Day Creation Schedule ("This seems doable" - but science can be hard!) infantile Adam, alternative Eve, an apple in Eden made as tempting as possible by the Big Beard himself or Jesus and daddy-dearest playing Good God / Bad God.

Death is ubiquitous (I'm afraid). Beware approaching your idols with unconditional and unquenchable adulation, especially if they have a scythe. I loved the bubble-bursting of the beach-side, Death-match chess match in Ingmar Bergman's 'The Seventh Seal'. After a solemn silence, the knight asks:

"Which way's the horsey move?"

Other caveats include "Never mess with a magician" (they have mad skillz) and here's a thought: what the Simon Pegg is so scary about zombies? There's a great big plot-hole in almost every outbreak of urban overrunning which is this: we have massive military armies with bigger numbers and superior firepower. In WWII the Allied Forces beat the Nazi Axis of Evil backed up by 18 million troops.

"Plus, Germany had bombs & planes not just biting & slow shuffling."

They're not going to break into a tank by gnawing on its gun turret.

Conversely, here's that humble chicken joke more closely examined:

"Why did the chicken cross the road?
"Why did the chicken receive a mysterious package?
"Why did the chicken make a fake passport?
"What the f*** is this chicken up to?"

Especially on a plane.

Plus there's a very funny reminder that Superman's an Alien. "Hiss!"

I leave you with a warning from Wizard School:

"All toilets are currently levitating or zombies".

I really wouldn't 'go' there.

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