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Hellbound Lifestyle


Hellbound Lifestyle Hellbound Lifestyle Hellbound Lifestyle

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Kaeleigh Forsyth & Alabaster Pizzo

Price: 
£7.50

Page 45 Review by Stephen

"I'm going to start wearing lipstick and if that doesn't get me anywhere I'll begin to address my emotional problems."

All the funnier for being delivered deadpan by writer and artist alike, these are succinct Notes To Self satirise bad behaviour, warped priorities and consumerist claptrap like editorial advertisements.

With primary colours which belie the procession of daily disappointments, they're clever without screaming about how clever they are.

"Intimate life details I know about dudes who only possibly remember my name", for example, is not just a list of extraordinary confidences or confessions, which sounds sweet, but - when you consider the title - a searing indictment of the self-obsessed: those who don't listen nor care to ask questions.

HELLBOUND is also one big commiseration with those who feel - or are made to feel - lonely, inadequate or unfulfilled.

"New goals for 2016" includes:

"Cry less in public
"Cry less in private
"Continue not having children
"Get to 5pm every day without fastening cinder block to ankle + walking into East River
"Clean grout in shower."

Boastful round-robin Christmas or New Year messages are given a good roasting, as is Ernest Hemingway, while "Problems I've Learned To Live Around' will speak volumes to the world's worst procrastinators like me.

You can be sure that self-validation through approbation on social media like Instagram and Twitter crops up and I laughed at myself a lot then.

One of the finest sequences involves a language learning app taken "to kill time & quell the mind demons on the flight home". The humour is cumulative as the app offers up sentences to translate from German which are as random as they are ridiculous as they are least likely to lull your thoughts from imminent plane-crash conflagration.

My favourite, however, is a single page in which our long-suffering lady has dressed up smartly for a date (lipstick dutifully applied) and sits with all the composure in the world on a train en route to meet him, while casting her mind back on all their previous liaisons. She's drinking. Heavily.

"by the time i get to the stop i hate him abd am embarrassed to br seen our w/ him"

Now would probably be a good - if not propitious - time to start addressing those emotional problems instead.
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