Christmas Shopping At Page 45

Right, let’s talk Christmas presents again/already.

First off, DC and Dark Horse have already been soliciting books which won’t arrive until March so if in doubt as to whether they’ll be available before Christmas, do ask!

We know a lot of you have minimal time for Christmas shopping – you might even be serving behind a counter yourselves – so each year we revel in the military exercise that is finding the right book for the right person, using whatever time you have to hand. Here’s where Page 45 can help you on the shop floor…

Scenario A:

1. Make a list of the graphic novels you’d like to receive for Christmas.

2. Distribute this list to your friends and relatives.

3. Tell them they can present the list at the counter, and we’ll find the books for them. You won’t believe how relieved they’ll be at this service.

4. If they buy something someone else has bought you this year or at any other time, so long as you bring it back in prime condition you can exchange it for anything else later on. Absolutely no scowls that you have taken us at our word because it is our word, and here we’re renowned for sticking to it. We will thank you or your friends for having shopped with us in the first place.

Scenario B:

1. Ask your friends and relatives to surprise you. Tell them to come in and ask us for recommendations based on your own predilections, comicbook-orientated or otherwise. We do this over a dozen times each working day, let alone Christmas, and we absolutely love it!

2. We’ll give them four or five options to choose from, seemingly extemporised but actually memorised from each other’s fifteen years of written reviews!

3. See 4 above. Also if, for some unusual (but not unheard of) reason we’re wrong, just bring it back and swap as usual. Personal recommendations at Page 45 all year round come with a swapsies guarantee.

Scenario C:

1. If you want to convert your friends to comics, we also have God knows how many years experience between us in doing just that.

2. Come to the counter, tell us a little bit about what your friends and/or relatives are into in other media, and we’ll come up with several suggestions for what’s good as an introduction to comics based on their wider tastes. We understand the word “introduction” because we’ve been trying it on our own friends for years.

3. See 4 in Scenario A

4. See 3 in Scenario B.

5. Throw a 6 and move on to haberdashery.

Scenario D:

1. Page 45 has gift vouchers available in denominations of £5-00£10-00£20-00.

2. By ‘denominations’ we mean the smallest increments available, but £10,000 worth of Page 45 gift vouchers are easily purchased and popped in an envelope through credit card transactions or worldwide money laundering which we will happily take care of for you.

3. We cannot redeem book tokens, sorry: we’re not a book shop and do not qualify. Please ask for Page 45 gift vouchers before Christmas instead. Free card, free envelope, and free smiles and thanks to all.

4. You or your friends can now go on guilt-free spending sprees. Hurray!

Scenario E:

1. Do nothing at all and receive socks.

2. Wear socks, read nothing.

3. Wash socks, lose one of those socks in the wash and then grumble.

Page 45 is open:

Monday to Saturday 9am to 6pm

December Sundays before Christmas only: 11am to 4pm

Tel: (0115) 950805

This has been a transparent marketing ploy on behalf of Page 45, posted in good time to be emulated by everyone else.

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